Moment of Truth

Moment of Truth

I know its been a year since that shit storm that was my crises happened....
Which hurt the one I STILL love and care about.

And some of you may think I should just give it up....
But I can't.
You see....

A certain wolf wrote his name on my heart in permanent marker...
I cannot give up while that mark is still there.

I can give him space so he can heal, and let him be himself.
I can -and will- support and care for him, and I will spoil him - even as his friend.
I know I may have as much of a chance as anyone else... but I still want to try because I do love him.

Only reason anyone was able to "swoop in" and try to steal me away was that I felt he gave up and didn't care about me.
And that person was never able to really even get close to my heart.

I enjoy being his friend...
He helped me to realize how miserable I really was with my current situation.
But being as soft hearted as I tend to be....
It took a VERY long time for me to do anything about it...
Even though I was begging to be rescued.

After the wuff proved me wrong about him not caring...
The cosmos brought us back into a good friendship...
That said a lot to me when he sorta came back, after months of not speaking to me.

Then he started to bring a thought I had buried in the back of my heart to the front of my mind:
I had made a mistake with this other person... and it was not meant to work out.

Sadly, I am soft hearted, and without some outside influence, I may have just let myself settle with the situation I ended up putting myself into:
Which sadly was worse than what happened before.

Being soft hearted, and even with the realization that things needed to change I knew it would take me some time to gather up the courage to ACTUALLY do something about it.
(The wuff knowing me as long as he has, hopefully knew and/or realized that.  He has called me slow many times, and with this little bit, he's right.)

So it took me a while to finally start correcting these issues and removing these people from my home, which I still am in the process of doing.

If if wasn't for the wuff giving me hints and clues, and showing he cared, that process may still not have even been started.

But he knew he had to do things this way... for it was also the ONLY thing to help my own self esteem.
Which has helped...
For now I realize that not only have I made something of myself....
But I've not only been able to support myself, but others as well.

Soon, all these problems will be resolved...
I just hope I haven't done too little, too late...